You’re Not That Special

As I walk up to the bus, I don’t question whether I have the right to enter first. Yes, people were there before me, but it’s just me, one small exception. Oh, I have to scan my ticket this time, too? Well, everyone else will simply have to wait for me to get it out of my bag! What’s the big deal? Ah, the bus is crowded today? Well, I will take the best standing space at the very front, so what if I block everyone behind me? They can squeeze by; it doesn’t matter as long as I have a good spot.

I obviously still deserve to be the first person to get off the bus though. How else will I be able to block people’s way, enjoying my lazy morning stroll through a busy metro station at rush hour? Preferably walking in unpredictable zig-zag patterns to stop any rude attempts at passing me, and blocking at least one metro gate while fishing for my ticket once more. If I’m not rushing, why would anyone else have to? And did I mention that I am always speaking loudly on the phone? Who cares if I’m bothering people?

In social situations, I make the rules. I speak if I want to, and everyone else needs to listen. Don’t interrupt me because I will speak over you until you stop to wait for your turn. Everyone, be quiet because it’s finally time to tell you about me! Oh, you’re telling a story? Well, it’s your lucky day because I’m about to bless you with my take on it! Because why wouldn’t you want to hear my every thought and opinion? Maybe I can even manage to make it about myself? If there is space left after that, the rest of you can compete for the chance to speak. Sorry, not everyone can be as important as me.

Did you see what that person did?! Making plans that don’t involve me or talking about topics not connected to me? That’s practically a personal attack against me! Of course, I can spend time with anyone I like because that is up to me. Not everyone needs to join every time, except for me, of course. Oh, you’re doing something cool in your life that you are excited about? Well, I don’t know, I may or may not have the time or energy to care right now. But when I’m doing something cool, you better believe that you will hear about every detail, whether you asked for it or not! You see, it’s just different when it’s about me.

Everything is just so great when the world revolves around me, me, ME!

What I’m trying to say is that I do think we would all benefit from realizing that the world does not, in fact, revolve around us. To some degree, self-centeredness is necessary for survival, and of course, not all of us are at the level described above. But either an increasing amount of people are, or I have just gotten extra tired of it lately. The theme is controversy after all, and this is my unpopular opinion: all of us, including myself, think that we are way more special than we actually are. In reality, we are all equally, wonderfully unimportant and ordinary.

I mean, what would happen if everyone thought like the above? Or what if they, just once, did not give you room to chatter away anytime you want to or give you all that space to take up? What if the background characters of your life weren’t actually background characters but unique individuals with just as much worth as you? Sure, we are the main character of our own life. But not anyone else of the billions of people we are supposed to share our space with. Wouldn’t the world become a little bit brighter if we were better at showing each other some empathy?

It is great to have this inherent security in the fact that people find you important and interesting and that they care about you. That you matter. Maybe part of why this bothers me so much is that I actually lack some of this security. Wait, does that perhaps even make me the self-centered one? Am I actually saying that unless I’m allowed to claim as much space as I wish to, nobody should?

Oh well, to everyone who might need a reminder, including myself:

Not everything is about you.

You’re not that special.